Moldy Bread

I always remember culminating my christmas wish list for Santa.  My mom guided us through it and told us to write 5 things we wanted from Santa and 5 reasons why we deserved it.  It was much easier to come up with 5 gifts than it was to come up with 5 good deeds.  This year, with Riley, I now understand why my mom did this 5 and 5 thing.  I asked Riley what he was going to ask Santa for Christmas and the list went on and on!  And all I was thinking was "this kid is out of his mind if he thinks he is getting all this crap…he better start earning his keep!"  No one wants to raise a selfish kid, but like mold on old bread, it just happends.   Well! I am determined to not let my kids get moldy attitudes about holidays and birthdays.  

Since Riley could understand the concept of Christmas, we have told him that Christmas is about Jesus.  We have read stories to him and last year he really seemed to grasp the "Jesus" thing.  So this year I was going to lay it on a little thicker and tell him that the only reason we have Christmas is because of Jesus.  That its Jesus's birthday and because he is up in heaven and not on earth, we open presents, decorate and get together in honor of him.   

Maybe I should back up and let you know we had a tragic death about a month ago.  My mom's dog, Sophie, died in October.  In fact, the dog passed a day or two before me and the kids went up for a visit to Clear Lake.  I thought "maybe Riley won't notice?"  WRONG.  The first thing he asks me is "where's Sophie?"    My mom had already "googled" how to explain death to a child…but see, what "google" doesn't realize is…it's Riley were explaining it to.   

So we go with the the old generic "Sophie isn't here any more, she is in heaven with God."  

THE END.  (or so I thought)  

his response "Why did God take Sophie!?" 

"Weeeeeeelllll….God didn't take her, she got sick…and then God let Sophie go to doggie heaven." I said half way confidently

After about 10  "where is she?" and "why?"

He disgustedly said "I don't want God to have her, I want her here…WHERE IS SHE!?"

Ok new approach: 

"Sophie died and her body stopped working and Grandpa buried her in the ground…her spirit is in the clouds with God"  I firmly said, thinking that would comfort him

NOPE.

He angrily stated "I don't want her spirits to be in the clouds…."humph!"  I. AM. MAD. AT. GOD!"

I fired back "HOLD IT!  Don't be mad at God…he didn't make sophie sick…he just let he come to heaven after she died."

Riley proclaimed "Then I am going to heaven too!"

Oh Geeez!

This conversation went on for days!  and then periodically for weeks!  and just when I thought it was passed…I told Riley what Christmas was about.  

"we celebrate Christmas because Jesus is up in heaven with God…."

"HUMPH!  I DON'T LIKE GOD! He took Jesus and Sophie!"

SERIOUSLY!  Are you kidding me kid!

I had had enough…and this blurted out of my mouth "well guess what!  If you don't like God, then you can't celebrate Christmas and then you don't get presents from Santa…you get a black rock in your stocking!"  (I know mother of the year!)  My intention was not to hostage my child into "liking" God, but it had been an exhausting couple of weeks explaining death to a 4 year old!  I said it out of frustration…not really thinking it would end anything.  

Riley's response: "OK!"

Well…MOLDY BREAD. I guess we will try again next year.