Yes, that's right…I occasionally pump some iron. Okay, who am I kidding, I go and walk/run on the treadmill and do the triceps machine. I do love to run outside…however after 3 kids, my body now creeks when I move and starts to fossilize if I sit too long, making running hard on my joints. Plus the colder weather makes running on concrete less appealing. This is why we have a gym membership. I went while I was pregnant…spending most of my time on the elliptical. Now postpartum, I decided to run on the treadmill to meet a 100 mile goal I set, however, me and the treadmill have a hate/hate relationship. 1 of the 3 things ALWAYS happens to me when I step on the treadmill:
1) THE LARGE overly exuberant sprinter: I will be the only one using a treadmill and out of all the machines this person picks…they pick the treadmill right next to me…S.P.R.I.N.T.I.N.G! and I SWEAR he watches my TV
2) IN THE ZONE: high speed and up hill and I accidentally hit the emergency stop button. CRAP!
3) TECHNICAL PROBLEMS: My tv speakers go out or all of a sudden change volume and blow out my ears drums!
After I have tortured my patience on the treadmill, I move onto the weight machines. All the machines can be adjusted: seat height, arm length and weight of coarse. I was very apprehensive at first to use any machines, fearing I would look like I had never used the machines, because I hadn't. I'm that person that slowly walks by the machines acting cool but is really reading the instructions as I walk by, deciding weather that machine will make look even more like a dumb ass. At first I stuck with the, what I consider, easy machines. Chest press, leg press and tricep press. A couple weeks ago, I decided to be brave and try some new machines. There weren't too many people in the gym…so it was a good day to try something new. I did my regular routine on my regular machines and then did my creepy loop to see which machines looked the least embarrassing. The ab crunch machine looked promising…all I had to do is sit and use my elbows to pull down the weight. I sat down and read the instructions (out of the corner of my eye) and tried the first crunch…the seat was too low. So searched for the lever to raise the seat, I couldn't find it anywhere. I read the instructions again…seriously! nothing about seat raising. So I just started pulling nobs and levers, and I finally found the magic button. I adjusted my seat, looked around to see if any one witnessed me on my hands and knees trying to find the seat button…and began to sit down to start my ab workout. However, IF there would have been instructions on the ab machine on how to adjust your seat height, I would have known to move the seat up until I heard a click, because, as I sat down on the seat, it fell right out from under me and me and my fat ass fell with it…and to top it off I screamed ever so gently, which made everyone look at me. I stood up, brushed myself off and tried to pick up what was left of my pride. I took a deep breath and thought to myself "don't leave in shame…if fatty McButter Pants can sprint his ass off on the treadmill shaking the entire gym, then you can finish your workout on the evil ab machine" I once again…adjusted the seat…gave it a heavty kick down to make sure it was locked in place and did my mother trucking ab workout.
you make me laugh!!! :)
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