Flash Back Friday

Oh how much we've grown since last Halloween...yes last year we could "roar", but we couldn't say "lion"

This year we are a football player, and we can kick, throw, catch, tackle and run for a touchdown!

To Whom It May Concern

To whom it may concern

10 years ago today…
In the past I have written a note describing our pain and the tragedy we went through 10 years ago today, posting it on facebook, with hopes people would  maybe be reminded or maybe hoping people would feel sorry for us?? I’m not quite sure why I did it.   I never knew the exact "DOD" until this year, I never had enough courage to look at the grave marker or to ask, I never wanted to know until this year.  Maybe I wanted to know because this years marks the 10th year.  I thought I would do something special, like to really write a the most heartfelt  note yet...But I want to start thinking of this day differently.  So, instead of ruining your day or your week or maybe the rest of your year with a heartfelt note that brings up the pain from 10 years ago today,  I thought I would approach this day differently. Today I want to focus on all that God has left to me.  Dad was not our only gift from God, although a gift none of us were willing or ready to give up…we still have so many other wonderful gifts in our lives and Dad would want us to quit sulking and feeling sorry for ourselves.  So here is a list of gifts from God I am thankful for and I am going to take full advantage of this year and the years to come.

• Loving Husband- Someone who can pick me up and put me in my place when I go too far (I blame the Butler in me) Someone who makes me feel safe and makes life fun.  A father to our children and a provider for our home.
• Family-living close to family again is such a blessing, I am always thinking of an excuse to spend time with family.  
• Grandparents who adore their grandchildren and make holidays special for them.  Parents who always have our back and give great advice.  
• Siblings who make me laugh and remind me I am never without a friend.  
• Riley and baby #2-  truly give me a purpose in life, inspire me to live better for them, to be a better person, an example for them.  
• Holidays-Christmas is making my giddy with joy this year, I can’t wait for snow, the smells, the food, family, Riley seeing his presents Christmas morning…the whole shebang!  

There are countless gifts in my life I am thankful for, I hope this note has reminded you of some in your life…

But most importantly, I hope this note makes the day, the week and even the rest of the year a little bit easier.

Family Pictures

Well, it's been 1 year since we have gotten family pictures and 8 months since Riley has gotten his pictures taken.  You would think I would be better about this.  We took a trip to Clear Lake to visit my mom and Steve and to have mom help with pictures.  Here are some of my favorites and the rest are on the family site.  Please let me know either through email or on the family site which picture and what size you would like me to send to you!

Carving Pumpkins

 Wednesday night we carved pumpkins,  I wanted to make a night of it (and I am always for starting new traditions) so we had chili, baked caramel apples, and carved pumpkins.  You could say it was the 1st Annual Lafrenz Pumpkin Fest!  :)  Riley was very patient while Ryan and I cut the tops and dug out the guts.  Some pumpkins were from the store, some from my mom's patch and one from the patch we went to last weekend.  The pumpkin Ryan is carving in the picture below was bought from the patch and was rotten, Ryan reached in and pulled out liquidy green goop, the smell made Riley gag and of coarse made him not want to stick his hand in any other pumpkin. We carved 3 pumpkins, I carved a little one for Riley and a medium one (spider)  and Ryan carved a large one (skulls)  It took Ryan and I a good hour to template and carve the pumpkins, so Riley watched Mickey's Trick or Treat...it was a good night.  :)

p.s. look for the video of Riley grossed out on the family site.  

Wordless Wednesday

New Floors

A portable floor was a plan I came up with when we were still in Monticello, I just couldn't figure out how to execute it.  After discussing it with Ryan we came up with the concept of a "floating floor".  Something that was flawless looking (so I didn't have to edit anything out later), that allowed me to switch backgrounds, and something that was durable. We got some high-gloss laminate  flooring and Ryan laid it out on some 2x4's and ply-wood.  And I love it!  Ryan Built-Riley approved!  Riley tested out the durability by jumping up and down, also some sample images from recent photo sessions to show how great these floors are.

17 Weeks

We had our 16 week appointment today, even though I am17 weeks,  they scheduled it from the heart beat appointment which was at 13 weeks...anyways!  Everything is just great, they pricked my finger to test my hemoglobin (iron, blood sugar, etc.)  I gained 4 pounds since my 12 week appointment making a grand total of 10 lbs...yikes!  My blood pressure was 122/74 and baby's heart beat was in the 160's again.  I can feel the baby move when I am sitting or lying down.  I am still fighting nausea and vomiting. Lately,  I find I can't eat anything "tasty"  or I feel like complete crap!  If I eat pizza I gain 4 pounds over night from the sodium and am stiff and sore in my joints.  So I stick to nutra grain bars, yogurt, fruit, veggies, chocolate milk, apple juice, lots of water, this must be my bodies way of telling me to take care of myself this pregnancy.  With Riley I ate everything in sight, Chinese, Pizza, Candy Bars, Soda...and carried the weight to show for it.  I officially have to sleep with a body pillow, sleep is getting down to about 5 hours a night, between tossing and turning, hands going numb, back pain, and up to the bathroom 1-2 times a night.  This pregnancy over all is a lot harder than I remember with Riley...maybe because this time I have a two 2 year old to keep track of.  Overall the doctor said everything looks great, the next appointment is November 10th at 4pm, we get a level II ultrasound, which checks for genetic heart defects.

I am wearing pink as a hint hint....last pregnancy I knew it was a boy...but this time I'm thinkin' pink.

Riley thought it was silly that mommy was taking pictures of herself, so he kept posing in front of me.  So we took a picture, I just told him to look at the beeping light (timer) on the camera!

Wordless Wednesday

Riley channeling his inner Flavor Flav...

Working at the car wash....

Ryan decided to wash his truck the old fashioned way, in the driveway with a hose.  And Riley couldn't stay inside and watch from the window, so I gave him a rag to help daddy wash the truck. By the time I went inside to grab the camera to document this father/son moment this is what I came out to:

No harmful chemicals were in the bucket, but needless to say, probably soap that wasn't made for little boys skin.  SO I went and made Riley his own bucket-o-suds.

it was just too much fun!

Sawyer Rose

This Thursday, I had the privilege to photograph Tiffany (Balvanz) and Heath Stolee's new baby girl Sawyer Rose.  Tiffany had a really hard labor and c-section and also ended up back in the hospital with congestive heart failure, but she bounced back and we finally got Sawyer pictures done!  Sawyer is 7 weeks here and she was such a doll.  Normally babies after 2 weeks are a little harder to keep a sleep and won't bend as easily, but Sawyer stayed asleep for a good 90 minutes and allowed me to even put some of my new hats on her.

To Put To Rest...

I got a call yesterday morning from my mom, she called to tell me she was going to bury my dad that afternoon.  She said she would have called me sooner, but since I had made perfectly clear in the past that I didn't want to participate in the spreading/burial of the ashes, she wasn't going to call at all, but felt the need to.  She was right, I normally would have said, "okay? I don't care..." But today I cared and I felt like I needed to be there.  My first thought was, "if I was going to bury Ryan, I would want Riley by my side"   my second thought was, "am I going to regret this later in life, if I don't go"

So Riley and I saddled up and made the quick trip to Eldora, where we visited with Grandpa and Grandma Collins, had lunch at the nursing home and finally Put To Rest dad's ashes.

It was certainly a bitter sweet day.
To see Grandpa Collins in such good health and spirits, is truly a miracle.  This man was practically dead-a goner-in the can....his bowels were considered dead, unusable: he couldn't sit up on his own: he needed constant care, everyday felt like his last.  NOW he can get up and out of his chair, walks up and down stairs, drives, cooks and his ultimate goal is to golf again, this man has more life to live and he is determined to live it!
Then to the graveyard to bury the ashes; for 10 years the box that houses dad's ashes sat at Grandpa and Grandma Collins's house and now they rest in the ground.  Grandpa, Grandma, Mom and I just stood around the box, no one said anything, after 10 years there is not much to say.  I held it together until Riley (out of no where and without coaxing) hugged the box and rested his head on it.  I don't like to read into things, but it was like he knew something important was in the "mysterious box" Of coarse once he heard me call a box, he tried his hardest to open it (it was sealed shut and made of solid wood)

It was an emotional day and brought back those feelings of emptiness and anguish.  But we all have to focus on the family we have and be thankful (I'm really trying to stay positive) I think the only thing that will ease my pain is to spend as much time with my family and know that I am passing the lessons my dad taught me on to my children, like:  pick your shoes up, children should be quite, peanut butter is a staple in any proper diet, and obsessive hard work and experimental exercises will make you the best (but you could always be better)

There's Always a Corner...

Discipline:  This word can be used as a noun or a verb( an act or an activity) and  there are many meanings to this word, such as; "activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill" or "behavior in accord with rules of conduct; behavior and order maintained by training and control"  But the definition that I like the best is "to bring to a state of order and obedience by training and control"  

I think one of the hardest things about being a parent is discipline, because in the case of disciplining your child...actions speak MUCH LOUDER than words.  Ryan and I both 100% agree on discipline, we have always talked about how we wanted to handle naughty children :)  But more importantly we talk about how we handle good children.  At the Lafrenz house we have a rules and if they are broken there is a punishment....dun dun dun....THE CORNER!!!!  But no matter where we are...there's always a corner:  in the mall, at grandma's house, at McDonald's...and so many more. We go by the rule of 3...Riley gets 3 chances, then he's out or rather in...the corner.  Let me give you an example:  The other day I wanted to put his shoes on to go to the store, Riley did not want his shoes on.  He got 3 chances to come, sit down and let me put the shoes on.  

      Mommy  "Last chance, come here and put your shoes on or go to the corner" Riley " NO!"  

"Okay...go to the corner"

We have a black step stool hidden by the front door for corner time, he sits there for 2 minutes ( a minute for every year)  No matter how uncooperative he is, he always willingly goes to the corner, kinda like he doesn't have a choice ;)  After the minutes are up we start over and he always cooperates after.  Some people don't believe in "time outs"  some people say they don't work.  I don't really think it's what you do, it's how you do it.  Consistency and Follow Through, if you said you were going to do it...do it. I will refer you to a clip from Modern Family.  Phil (the dad) talks big, but always follows through  http://www.hulu.com/watch/114111/modern-family-smoking   

We still have tantrums and we still have things to work on, but the corner will always be there to save us.

In this picture, Riley is in the designated corner in the basement...

Flash Back Friday

I have documented Riley and Bear's friendship from the very beginning.  When I was pregnant with Riley, Bear became very protective of the family.  She stayed by my side and napped with me every day.  After Riley was born, her inner guard dog surfaced, making all geriatric walkers and package carriers terrified of the killer beast! As soon as Riley could scoot his way, he would pull on Bear's ears, look in her mouth and lay on her belly.  They would both snoop out the windows at anyone passing by, when Bear growled, Riley giggled.  Now what used to be an innocent snuggled has turned into a back-breaking threat for Bear.  We are working on laying by puppy not on puppy.  As you can see we have some work to do...

Let's take a look back at this everlasting friendship....

                                                               Riley 20 Months

                                                                       Riley 19 Months

                                                                     Riley 16 Months

                                                                   Riley 15 Months

                                                                   Riley 14 Months

                                                                     Riley 11 Months

                                                                 Riley 8 Months

                                                    
                                                                    Riley 6 Months

                                                                    Riley 5 months